Fear of marriage

Marriage is the biggest and the toughest decision in one’s life. You always want to marry someone who loves and understands you, who remains loyal to you, who accept you as who you are and who remains with you in good and bad times in life.

Life changes after marriage. It’s not that you can’t enjoy, roam and hang out with your friends and pursue your hobbies after marriage, but after marriage, your responsibilities increase and you become busier. You get busy in your life and your friends get busy in their lives.

Marriage is something that a girl wants to make special and memorable. The day of marriage is the most memorable day for a girl and also the most painful day because she has to leave her family and home.

The life of a girl changes completely after marriage. Though the life of a boy also changes, but not as much as a girl. A girl has to leave his parents, siblings, and home to live with a new family in a new place. It’s not easy at all. A girl’s life changes in one moment. A girl has to adjust herself to a new family and their traditions and customs. 

A girl has always her fears about marriage. She keeps thinking about whether she will be able to adjust to a new place and family, whether her partner will love her or not and whether she will be able to make happy everyone or not. She keeps thinking about whether she will have a happy married life or not.

A boy’s life is also not easy. A boy also has to adjust after marriage. Before marriage, he can live his life according to his will but after marriage, he has to change himself and adjust with his partner. He has to take responsibility. He has to take care of her likes and dislikes. He has to support her in every situation.

The biggest fear a boy may have is the conflict that might happen between his wife and mother. A boy always has a fear of becoming a sandwich between his wife and his mother. He thinks who he should listen to, his wife or his mother. If he doesn’t listen to his wife, his wife becomes angry and if he doesn’t listen to his mother, his mother becomes angry. ‘Whom should he listen to?’ is a question that keeps running in the mind of a boy. He keeps fighting with this question throughout his life.

If the wife and mother of the boy have an understanding between them and they share a good relationship, then it’s good, but if they don’t like each other and keeps fighting each other, the life of the boy becomes hell. No one understands his pain. No one understands what he goes through every day.

In my post ‘My phobias’ I have mentioned that I have a fear of marriage. I have a fear that my marriage won’t last long. One of the reasons behind this thinking is my nature. I am short-tempered, I like being alone and I don’t socialize. I fear of commitment. I am not a responsible person at all. I can’t take care of myself, how will I take care of someone else? The only girl whom I can tolerate in this world is my sister (Hope that she won’t beat me). How will I adjust to someone else? Will I able to live up to her expectations? Will she be able to understand me? Will she accept my flaws? I don’t like it when my parents emotionally blackmail me to get married. They say who will take care of you after we die. They say you need to have someone in life to support you. Whenever my parents, relatives, friends and other people ask me to get married, I feel like I should just run away from this uncomfortable conversation or this world. Is marriage so necessary? Can’t be a person alone and happy? I am in a dilemma. Fear of marriage is draining me.

Marriage is complicated.


9 thoughts on “Fear of marriage

  1. Dear Manoj, I read what you wrote here, you already have a good understanding about what girl goes through after marriage. so, you are a great guy who will support her, any girl will feel lucky. Please look at your positive side too. You’re such a loving, kind and matured person too. Any negatives you can change for your own happiness. Hope you don’t mind my sisterly msg, saying all this 😊
    But don’t marry for anyone’s sake, if do, do it for your happiness.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. You will get totally an understanding life partner, that day you’ll realise all the fear you had didn’t workout. I’m shy, irresponsible, short tempered, introvert married for 7 years, feels like a miracle. It’s good you have so much understanding on the other side, your marriage Life will be good. Believe me✨😉 Merry Christmas ✨🎅

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Dude! looks like you’ve totally ruled out marriage. Donn’t do that. Love happens to everyone…and the natural step to that is marriage. Don’t worry – everything will happen when the time is right. Until then… continue living your life well. Who knows what’s to come…?

    Like

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