Being single

Being introvert, I live in my shell. I don’t talk too much. I am not a social person at all. I don’t like going to marriages, parties, or any other social gatherings. I don’t like crowds. I have very few friends. I don’t easily make friends or talk with people. I don’t easily mingle with anyone. Only if I like someone, then only I open myself to them.

Since childhood, I am alone so I don’t feel strange being alone, but, sometimes I feel a void. There is no one with whom I can share my feelings. At times, I feel that I need someone with whom I can share my feelings, who understands me, who listens to me, who cares for me, and who loves me unconditionally.

Being single is a mixed feeling. Being single, I can live my life in my way. I can enjoy the freedom. I don’t have to adjust or compromise with someone. But, at times, I feel the loneliness. Anxiety surrounds me. I start feeling anxious about being lonely.

It’s good to have someone in life who loves you unconditionally, understands you, listens to you without judging you, takes care of you, and stands by you no matter how bad things are going in your life.

I want to have someone like that in life, but I fear commitment because I have seen relationships falling apart around me. To have someone in life is an on and off feeling for me. Some days, I want someone to be in my life, but, some days, I don’t want anyone in my life after seeing relationships falling apart around me.

I am clueless. I am not able to decide what should I do. If I commit, will the relationship survive? If I commit, will I be able to live up to someone’s expectations? If I don’t commit, will I be able to live this life alone? There are only questions, but no answers. I am entangled between committing or not committing.

Searching for an answer.


20 thoughts on “Being single

  1. Hi,

    This is an amazing read. I felt my thoughts written out to me by someone else.
    People like us have gotten used to being alone and isolating even before it became a norm lately, but sometimes we do want to get out of it, far away to a place where we can freely live with people who know nothing or not so much about us and won’t judge, but love, care, comfort and encourage us regardless of the season we find ourselves.

    Relationships do fail, but not all. Don’t be afraid to commit, but don’t commit until you’re ready to. Please live your life the best way you can and in the moments you can, embrace friendship, love and all that gives you joy, peace and butterflies. The relationship may or may not survive, but that isn’t up to you to predict unless you try. What matters isn’t how long it lasts, but how well it was and the memories you want to make out from it.

    Personally, I don’t have expectations in my relationships with people, but I do communicate what I love and hate, want and don’t and make compromises when I can.

    You are amazing and whether you end up with someone else or alone, know that you’re loved, appreciated, amazing and you have tons of others who relate to your story.

    Love,
    Cocoa.

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  2. Loved reading this. I’m going to be very clichè and suggest that you follow what feels right. We’re all a bit afraid of commitment and love is always a risk but one worth taking, every time. So you just have to embrace the fear and open your heart!

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  3. I can totally relate with you. I used to feel like I can live with being alone for the rest of my life but I guess it’s also true that you need to find your other half to make life easier and you’ll always have someone to catch you and where you can help each other too.

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  4. There is nothing as you need someone to complete you.. you are the whole, not any half or quarter.. but having said that, if you feel like you need someone to hold your hands, go with your mind.. don’t overthink..after all life is not to be taken too seriously..just breathe the moment without being mean to others.. well, dont take my words as advices or so.. just something what I’m also trying to grasp..

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  5. I’d say, enjoy your freedom while it lasts, really! 😅 Finding a non-judgemental, unconditional person (friend or otherwise) these days is like finding needle in a haystack. Just like you’d mentioned in your article about impatience, people are only becoming less and less tolerant with others. Unless you find someone who does indeed care deeply, it’s a waste of time to commit. Just my view. Not wise, as I’m still a “child.”Hope you figure out what you want and things go well for you! 🙏😊

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